This is not another damn post about getting your pre-baby body back. Oh no, you'll have to pick up a tacky trash mag if you're wanting to read a bunch of lies. Erika Cramer is The Queen of Confidence and she's here to dish up a dose of reality about loving yo' self sick. After kids, you're faced with a completely different body, but it's not all doom and gloom. Erika is here to provide you with 6 kick-arse tips that will help you get back to being besties with yourself. You CAN truly love your postpartum body. Promise!
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Written by owner of The Queen of Confidence - Erika Cramer.
Ok let’s keep it real here honey, I know that stretch marks, engorged boobs and jiggly tummy skin, may not have been your idea of a hot body.
I know, I hear you.
After being a professional bikini model (pre-baby) then fast forward to my first pregnancy where I gained 16 kilos (yup that happened) I know a thing or two about looking in the mirror in shock and the whole wanting your "pre-baby body back”.
But here’s the thing sista, it’s impossible.
That amazing body of yours is on a whole new level. Not only has it changed on the outside but so much is going for you on the inside (all that healing, repairing, restoring and nourishing). Some of us may gain or lose more weight than others but one thing is for sure, your body will never be the same. And that’s a good thing!
If you were able to conceive and birth a human baby there is something to be celebrated. So you made a mircale! But why is it that so many mothers find themselves looking at their bodies in the mirror and feeling a sense of disappointment?
Why is it that so many of us obsess about our old body and how we ‘need to get out pre-baby bodies back’? How did this become a thing?
Well, thanks to all the magazines, celebrities, diet culture and media outlets who get major pay days for conditioning women to look “thin AF” as Khloe Kardashian has recently put it or "getting back into your pre-baby skinny jeans" articles. F-that noise. I am here to tell you, you can actually start to love and appreciate your body right now, AS IS.
I know it can feel like a stretch especially when you see those annoying “Just love yourself” quotes on Instagram. It’s like you just want to throw your phone across room, right? Me too girlfriend.
Well I truly believe we can learn to actually, genuinely love and show appreciation to our post-partum bodies.
I have got you covered hon, just follow these 6 steps:
1. Be gentle with yourself (& reframe your body).
You didn't just wake up one day with a bloated saggy belly, a separated abdominal wall or stretch marks everywhere, you had a freaking baby. You grew a human inside of your body. I mean seriously, take that in. I’ll wait...
Reframe your current body, really put it into context. Think of your body as something separate to yourself if you need to, and see it for the amazing, powerful and strong experience it went through.
2. Stop living in the PAST.
Give up the desire to bring back the old “pre-baby body” talk. Practise being present with your body right now. It’s never coming back - Actually every year you have a new body, pretty crazy right?! (Don’t mind if I geek out here on some sciencey stuff) but every 4 weeks you have brand new skin and every 6 weeks a new liver, 98% of the atoms your body is made up of weren’t there a year ago! I mean seriously mama - why not give thanks for your ‘today body’? It deserves your love, presence and attention.
3. Take your attention else where.
Step away from your phone and put down the gossip magazines. No seriously.
Social media can be the worst or the best thing for your confidence so, UNFOLLOW any account that make you feel like crap and like you’re not good enough. Then follow women and mothers who are keeping it real in the #nofilter #youareenough space. Stop reading celebrity gossip or women's magazines that have all the lose weight get thinner articles all over them.
4. Practice gratitude.
Commit to a practice of gratitude for your postpartum body. If you've been blessed enough to have a carried and birthed a baby, show your body some gratitude. Practice holding your stomach with your eyes closed and thank it for doing all it did for you and your baby. You made your own organ for goodness sake! Thank that womb of yours, your amazing body has created life.
5. Create a mindfulness ritual.
Commit to just one thing you can do to practice more mindfulness in your daily routine. I know it can be super hard with little ones around but find something that makes you feel good. I burn incense or palo santo sage in the morning while we get breakfast sorted (and of course with the wiggles doing the propeller in the background). Or listen to a podcast in the car - Super Soul Sunday is a fav! Or do a 1 minute meditation to stop our monkey mind.
Fill your mind with the things that make you feel amazing. Just because you have had a baby doesn’t mean you can’t listen to an awesome uplifting audio book in the background whilst cleaning up, cooking or driving to do the shopping.
If you decide to unwind while the kid(s) are asleep, chose consciously what you want to give your attention to. Married at First Sight may not make you feel good, or help you relax - so pick up a book or listen to a podcast that is uplifting. Feel on purpose.
6. Cull that which does not serve you.
Get rid of the clothing that makes you feel frumpy, lazy and meh. Don’t hold onto maternity clothing just because, or that stretched out t-shirt with the holes in it. Cull it and make space for the things that make you feel good, fresh, even a bit sass. Even though you may lose weight and will need to shop again, get rid of the clothes that don’t give great vibes, your mental health will thank you.
I invite you to also cleanse the ‘inner wardrobe’. Are there thoughts or beliefs you keep telling yourself that aren’t helpful? Or that no longer serve you? Let go of all the thoughts and things that way you down sista.
Learning to be with your new body is a practice and a journey. Hopefully these tips will help you on your way to realising how beautiful and blessed you are.
Shine bright honey!
ABOUT THE QUEEN OF CONFIDENCE
Confidence Coach taking a bold stand for women to reclaim their relationship with self confidence.
Business owner: Erika Cramer
Fav café: 15 Pounds
Coffee order: Double Shot Piccolo.
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