Elizabeth's motherhood story - What I love about our interracial family
The very first time I met my partner…was at a night club, how classy, right? We started chatting instantly! I remember I handed over my number and ditched him for the RnB room with the girls not expecting to hear from him ever again. I heard from him five minutes later. Six months later we moved in together. 1.5 years later we had the sweetest baby boy together. This was a big surprise coming from the girl who had always said to her friends that she didn’t want the boyfriend, the kids and the white picket fence thing. I wouldn’t have it any other way now, I love my colourful little family but it hasn’t all been rainbows and fairy dust.
I am Australian and my partner is Fijian. We are two people, two colours, two very different cultures with two different perspectives on life. Mix it all together, add a baby, some judgemental strangers and you can be left with a clash of values, strong opinions, tough chats and plenty of shitty arguments. It’s fair to say that my relationship is a constant eye opener. The pros far out way the cons though, here are my favourite parts of interracial dating:
We get to learn about each other’s cultures…We grew up seeing the world in very different ways. Our experiences of life are completely different and because of this there can be tension when we are trying to explain to the other something culturally specific. Nevertheless, we are both so lucky to get the chance to see a view of the world from a completely different perspective. While I know I will never fully understand my partner’s life or upbringing I always try to ‘get it’ as much as I can.
We get to travel…having a partner from another culture means that you’re thinking about and planning the next trip to visit their homeland. You get to explore other areas and, in our case, islands of their homeland too (although we are yet to do that...hmm). An added bonus is that we have been able to introduce friends and family to each other’s culture too by having them travel with us or to us.
We get to educate racist people… because unfortunately racism is still around and there are some people you don’t like seeing others date another race. No one is born to hate or be racist, it is a learned behaviour – it comes from family, friends and society. I often see people looking at us when we are together as a family, some are just curious or confused, but there is always a look of disapproval thrown in. I always feel sorry for those people, and I make a point of kissing or cuddling my boys in front of them because at the end of the day, love is love and cupid’s arrow has no bias.
We always notice other interracial couples…and it makes us smile. Even if their backgrounds are completely different to ours, we can instantly relate to them. I think it’s so great for society to see more and more interracial couples.
Most importantly, our son will have the best of many worlds…he will have at least two cultural backgrounds because he will grow up with two different cuisines, two different traditions and holidays, two different languages, two sets of values (good ones), and two different countries to visit. Apart from that, he is also very lucky to be part of a multicultural extended family. My brother-in-law is American & my sister-in-law is Brazilian. Our children will be the best of friends. They will learn about each other's countries, cultures, values & beliefs. They will learn that they aren't superior to another person, race or religion. They will learn that everyone in this world is equal. They will learn that if a rainbow was just one colour, it wouldn’t be beautiful.
While being in an interracial relationship is not easy, it’s an experience of a lifetime and I feel so lucky to be part of it. It is fascinating to be able to sit with and learn from someone who had a completely different upbringing and view of the world. Growing up, I never expected my life to look like this, but I wouldn’t change a damn thing.
This world is so diverse, people are people and love is love...be kind to everyone you meet.
Mama, Virtual Assistant, will never turn down champagne, cheese and a girl’s night. Undercover trashy TV addict with a phobia of armpits (not a joke).
Motherhood in 5 words: Life-changing, challenging, messy and amazing.
Fav family-friendly place: Bundoora Farm
Coffee order: Skinny Latte (I’ll take three)
Biz: Latte Mama Virtual Assistant
One mama helping other mamas focus & work on their own goals & dreams. Providing freedom, flexibility & family time for themselves & their families.
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